sigh, women...

Life has been crazy busy lately.  Our good friends the Engstroms drove through on their way to medical school out east and stayed for a few days.  It was fun to hang out, play games, and eat out at our favorite restaurants.  Just before they came we had another check up with the dr, and I conitnue to progress every week.  I'm still 80% effaced but am now 2 cm dilated so things keep chugging along.  

There are tons of pics that I need to upload from the Engstroms visit, our recent maternity photo shoot, and our newly finished nursery, but that can wait for another day.  Seriously, I was so excited for the whole icloud concept and would still be excited if it actually worked.  It only picks and chooses which photos/videos it uploads to my pc and if I want to get all of the pics I have to still plug in my phone, and these days I try to avoid things that will annoy me at all costs.

So as to the title of this post, since getting pregnant my eyes have been opened to the crazy world of moms with strong opinions.  Naturally since I am very large with child the topic ALWAYS comes up no matter who I am around so basically that's all I talk about with people.  Now, at first this was fun and exciting and depending on the person, I don't mind it.  I just find it terribly ironic that all of these women, who have been pregnant before and know how it is, still proceed to ask all the same questions/bring it up anyways.  I mean... I assume they know how annoying it can be towards the end when you're REALLY tired of being pregnant, you're not feeling very attractive/comfortable/ etc. so why would they conitnue to do to you what they found to be so annoying back when they were pregnant?  I mean self-aware RMs know not to ask recent RMs the question: "how was the mission?" (stupidest question EVER just FYI for those who didn't serve a mission or have since forgotten how annoying those over-simplistic questions can be.) So why can't mom's remember how it was and throw me a bone?

Now before you start freaking out that you've somehow offended or annoyed me-relax, I realize that I'm a crabby pregnant woman and really don't mind it most of the time, so don't feel like you can't come up to me and talk to me- I just want to remind everyone that I have not lost my ability to talk about subjects other than baby things as well, infact I'd welcome it!

All that being said, sometimes I wish I wasn't so perceptive of people's thoughts/feelings.  I wish I could be blissfully ignorant and take what everyone says at face value, but I can't help but notice expressions, pauses, and I have good gut instincts when it comes to these sorts of things.  The point of all of this?  Cody and I have decided to induce a little early.  Now, chances are, you are sitting there just having read this and have an opinion on the subject-maybe even a strong opinion.

Because I can read people, I can tell that most people we tell this seem to have an opinion on it-whether they voice it or not....and frankly I have to ask why??? Do you think that we haven't weighed all of our options, thought all of this through, and have good reasons for it?  More importantly, do you think we would take the health of our little guy and myself lightly, and not make sure that the Dr approves/says it will be fine etc?  That we haven't talked about it/prayed about it etc?

frankly, I'm not going to list all of the different reasons for this decision cause I don't feel like I should have to, but everytime I tell someone the exciting news of when we're going to start bringing our little man into the world I'm met with surprised looks and the question "why?" No excitement.  No congratulations.  Most of the time (after I've explained why) we don't even get a lame "well that makes sense" just an "oh...ok" and a weird half nod/shrug, and I'm left feeling judged and sensitive.  

Why do moms assume that there's one universal right way to do something (in regards to kids) that applies to everyone, and heaven forbid you approach something a little differently.  I mean, I won't lie, there are certain parenting techniques or opinions out there that I find a little crazy, but if someone shared with me what they found to be right for them and their particular situation I wouldn't judge them or look at them weird-I'd say cool, yay for you etc etc.  Just cause it's something that isn't to my taste doesn't mean it's wrong, it's just another option.  

It's like those moms out there who think that you're somehow less of a mom if you take painkillers during delivery, or if-for whatever reason- you decide to go the formula route rather than breastfeeding etc.  Now, honestly I could care less what you decide to do for all of the above, and I personally don't feel strongly either way.  I know what I'm going to try to do, but if certain things don't pan out or we have to adjust how we do things-it's not the end of the world, and thinking that there's only one way to go about something puts entirely too much pressure on yourself. I don't believe for one second that there's only one acceptable way to do something-even kid to kid.  Who knows what our circumstances will be in the future for our 2nd, 3rd, etc kid-just cause I did A,B, and C with kid #1 doesn't mean that that's they way I HAVE to do it with kid #2 etc.

I just hate how women have this need to judge one another and make themselves feel more secure about their personal choices by making everyone around them feel insecure about the choices they've made.  I know it's probably because we all feel very strongly about motherhood/love our kids etc, but frankly I think most of it is very much misguided.  Why can't we all love eachother and be eachother's cheerleaders?  We all know how hard the job is so why burden each other with our judgements, but instead encourage one another to be moms-in whichever way works for us.

ok, random rant officially over.  And really, I'm not writing this with any particular people in mind, just through my own experiences/and stories I've heard from other women.

We are really excited though and can't wait for all of the precious and- no doubt- hilarious moments that await us.