This is what happens when an introverted person is tired after a days work of running after three year olds, talking to parents, and comes home only to say hi to the hubby and turn around in five minutes to head back out to Enrichment Night-or whatever the heck you're supposed to call it. I get frustrated because I am not allowed to recharge-I need my recharge!! and mingling and chatting it up with a bunch of people I don't know-no matter how nice they are, is not my idea of recharging! Tonight I could have really used a calm sit down spiritual type of lesson where there is a lot of time to think to yourself etc. Granted, the night was way cute-they put a lot of effort into it...it just wasn't quite what I needed tonight. Oh, and I haven't even gotten to my vent part yet-yeah...I'm a real gem tonight.
So my vent: this is just a tip to all people who are meeting a younger person than yourself who just moved into the ward: do not use the term cute to describe their lives. Life is not meant to be "cute". A puppy dog is cute. A little kid with a speech impediment who can't say their "r's" is weewy cute, but life in general is not cute-whether you're 25 or 75.
What happened: not even a big deal, and I know that the person didn't mean it in a bad way, but ever since having moved out of a college ward (aka: fake ward according to the "real world") I have noticed little things here and there that aren't meant in a mean way but bug the heck out of me. So I was getting to know the sister to my right who had just moved into the ward a month ago-great I think, I can relate. So I ask the usual questions-where did you move from, how are you liking it so far, do you have any kids? etc. And naturally she asks similar questions to me since I eluded to the fact that I had recently moved into the ward. I told her that we had moved from Utah-that we had just graduated from BYU and moved out here. Her response: "oh cute!" I wanted to say, "which part? the graduating college part or moving out here part?"
i don't know what it is but i canNOT stand condescension when it comes to my level of life experience. This sort of all knowing attitude of: oh just wait, you have no idea-like the life I'm living somehow isn't "counting" yet because it's somehow not real. Here I was thinking that my life was full of deep and meaningful things.
I can't explain it, there's just this ever-so-slight feeling of not being taken seriously in an older family ward towards young couples that I don't handle very well. Whatever, their loss. Did i mention that I was tired?
and to close on a note that makes me happy (no i'm not visualizing faces on these people....)
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tY_Emf8SSA]
Oh yes, I can totally relate to the "your life is so cute". I have felt that way a few times in our new ward too and it is hard sometimes. Whether it's the fact that we just moved from BYU too or have only one baby so I haven't reached "real" mom status, or we are still "such newlyweds"...I totally understand where you are coming from!
ReplyDeleteAs a fellow introvert, I completely understand your feelings of needing to recharge.
ReplyDeleteSeriously ...such an odd comment. When I find out someone has just moved here from the college life my first reaction is not to say ...That's so cute! Cause that would be so dumb! I would be much more inclined to say something like: That's awesome, welcome to the ward! We'd love to have you over for dinner. Or ...Where do you live? What was your degree in. Are you working yet? ...what's your job? etc. etc. But Cute? Just doesn't make sense.
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